Product Description of

Have I Got to Have Another Scar? by P.G.Cook

My story takes us through the years of my post university life. Meeting my now wife and the subsequent years that followed. The birth of my daughter and the worrying times that lay ahead.

I knew becoming a dad for the first time would have its tough times. I just didn’t realise how tough. But then I hadn’t reckoned on anything other than a ‘normal’ birth. And perfectly healthy offspring. It had crossed my mind of course, but how many of us really think it could happen to us?

My Review

If you can read this book without shedding a tear or two, you are a stronger person than I! Peter Cook has written an extraordinarily moving account of his little daughter Charlotte and the traumatic experiences he and his wife have encountered since her birth.
A normal couple living in a regular house with ordinary jobs, they were over the moon when they fell pregnant with Charlotte but at just two days old their beautiful baby daughter fell ill and no one knew what was wrong with her. Imagine the terror of being a new parent and watching your newborn baby being taken from you and shuttled off to another hospital, lights flashing, sirens blaring and not knowing what would await you as you followed behind! Imagine the disbelief and angst when this happens again and again, when it seems you can’t have any more bad luck and still the bad luck finds you, again and again.
By the time she was two and a half Charlotte had seven operations for several different problems. Her parents, Pete and Debs have walked her into the operating theatres, waited in apprehension whilst she has been operated on, seen her wired to various machines, slept in hospital rooms and parent rooms, watched doctors faces crease with worry and seen the pitying looks of nurses so many times and yet every time they have watched their little princess fight and come back to them.
This is the story, as told by Pete, of his family and their love for Charlotte, a little girl with a seemingly indefatigable fight for life. No matter what Charlotte, Pete and Debs have gone through they have gone through it with a supporting cast of family, friends and wonderful medical teams in some of the best hospitals in Britain, which has helped them get through the toughest times of their lives.
Pete writes genuinely and from the heart, his love for his wife and children is obvious throughout and though he’d be the first to admit he’s a bit of a softy, the fact that he can show his feelings and then write about them is all to his credit. His heartfelt words take you with him through this journey, from meeting Debs and knowing she was the one, through their marriage and then from seeing Charlotte whisked off to intensive care to finally, hopefully, the all clear forever. Pete’s honesty had me choked up, tears welling, sighing with relief and then stomach dropping in horror as something else happened and those words at the end...well, I wish I’d had a hanky and a warning and I don’t mind admitting that I fell a little bit in love with Charlotte!
It’s quite incredible how one little family could go through so much but Pete and Debs and Charlotte have done so and they seem to have done it with as little fuss as possible, all their energy and efforts concentrated on Charlotte and despite it all remaining a normal and happy family, able to find humour and positivity at even the darkest times and just making the best of things as they could, never blameful and extremely grateful to all the medical staff who have mended little Charlotte; Pete and Debs even added to their family with little Sam, despite the turmoil that surrounded Charlotte.
It has been a pleasure to read Pete’s story, to read about the bravery and trust of these people and to be allowed a little insight into exactly how some children and families don’t always have the best start in life but will overcome adversity to become stronger. It’s incredibly brave of Pete to share his emotions and innermost feelings and thoughts with the public and a privilege to be privy to them.
Anyone who reads this book will, I feel, join with me in a heartfelt hope that they never have to go through this again!


Interview with P.G.Cook



I have to say, when I read that line, ‘daddy, do I have to another scar?’ I sobbed! Tell us first off, how is Charlotte doing now?

Well, touching wood (as I always do when someone asks this question) she is doing fine. We still have regular check ups but so far so good. And if you were to look at her now you would never know she had been through so much.


You’ve written a very from the heart, inspiring account of Charlotte’s operations and the impact it had on you as a family. Do you have plans to continue the story, hopefully with no scary operations but lots of family anecdotes? I’m sure I’m not the only reader who’d pick up another book just to know how your little family is getting on. Or do you fancy trying fiction?

Many positive things have come off the back of what we have been through, one of which is discovering my love of writing. I have written a few little short stores, some children’s stories and I did think long and hard about writing a follow up to this book but I have decided to try my hand at fiction. I am about half way through my first draft of a story about friendship, bullying and growing up in the 80’s. It is a work of fiction although I have drawn on a few true to life stories from my youth!

What made you want to share your story? What did you hope your book would do? Was it purely to help you come to terms with such an eventful few years, or do you hope it might help another family going through a similar situation? It was never my intention to write a book. As I mention early on in the book, I started writing upon the advice of a councillor at Addenbrookes hospital who told us that writing down your feelings was a great way of coping. I wasn’t coping very well at the time so took his advice. Then when Charlotte was discharged from hospital we decided to have a ‘welcome to the world’ party for her so that all of our friends and family could meet Charlotte and have a little cuddle. When we sent the invites out I put a short story with the invites about what we had been through. I honestly thought that would be the end of it but then Charlotte had a second operation so I put pen to paper again and then a third operation and fourth and so on. Before I knew it I literally had enough stories to fill a book. I then decided a book would make a nice keepsake for Charlotte when she was older so sat down with my awesome wife and family and friends and also called upon my own memories to fill in the gaps with some more ‘normal’ stories. Although I’m not sure getting your child’s poo on your head can be classed as ‘normal’.
As it turns out the book has achieved far more than I ever thought it would. I only chose to actually publish it because so many of my family and friends persuaded me to. And in hindsight, if it helps just one person get through a traumatic time then it will have been worth it.


If another family was in a similar situation to you, what would your advice be, or what would you say to them?

This has actually happened to us on a few occasions. Friends of friends have been in touch just to ask questions on the basis that we had been through it. They just wanted reassurance really which is totally understandable. I am always more than happy to meet up with people and talk them through our experiences and what to expect. I have done this several times and so has Debs (the wife). All people really want to know is “will my baby be ok?” well of course, nothing is guaranteed but in the main, whilst it is an incredibly stressful time you will come out the other side all the stronger for the experience. But you will be weaker before you get stronger and in the case of my family will be a lot fatter too because we sort salvation from just about every different take away establishment in and around the Bedford area.
The book that I have written is actually a great book to read if you are going through similar and I have had quite a few people say to me “that is exactly how I felt”. It makes me feel incredibly proud that through my book I have helped other families to cope.


One of the things that comes through quite strongly in your book is how great the hospitals and medical professions were, did that contribute to your faith in them and Charlotte or was it not something you could really think about whilst you were going through it?

Unless you see something that is quite obviously wrong then I don’t think you have much choice but to put your faith in the hospitals. My experiences have taught me that the administration side of the NHS could do with some improvement but when the chips are down and your little girl is quite literally dying in front of you then they are absolutely awesome. It can’t just be coincidence that almost every doctor, nurse, surgeon and specialist that we have dealt with have been brilliant with us.
Charlotte was also a little superstar. She never gave up on us. And as is so often the case with poorly babies and children, she just rolled her sleeves up and said “do your worst, I wont be defeated”. We still have the ‘I’m a little fighter’ t-shirt that I got printed for Charlotte. Every poorly child should have an ‘I’m a little fighter’ t-shirt. We really have come into contact with some truly amazing children in our time all of whom have been so brave.


I can only imagine what it would be like to be on the receiving end of one blow after another concerning my children’s health, how on earth do you cope with that and keep your spirits up? You say you were the consoled and the consoling and were lucky to have a deal of support but even so, you and Debs sound remarkably strong and level headed to go through all that and come out the other side.
Many people have said this but if the truth be known, you don’t actually have a choice. You just simply have to put your head down and crack on as best you can. Your priorities change quite rapidly when you have a poorly child. You cling on to every small little bit of hope that you can. Some days were tougher than others of course and some days I would find myself sat in the corner of a hospital waiting area sobbing my heart out but then that’s when your wife, or a nurse, or another parent that you’ve been sharing a ward with will come and put their arm around you, make you a cup of tea and give you a big hug. And more often than not just a few hours later it would be me making the tea for a different parent who it had all just got too much for and they’d broken down. It’s just the way it is. We are still in contact with some of the families we have met in our time. You form a bond with these people that tends to last. I actually look back with fondness of the times I would sit awake at 3 o’clock in the morning sharing a take away pizza with nurses and other parents, taking turns to man the fort while other parents left the ward for some fresh air or to get a coffee. If you ever start to doubt the kindness of the human race, go and spend 24 hours on a children’s ward in a hospital. It will make you cry but you will come out full of love and hope.
I must also add that we have seen some truly horrible sights in the various hospitals that we have stayed at, all of which have proved to me that we as a family are actually very lucky. On many occasions we arrived at hospital after parents who were still there long after we had left. We have seen some very poorly babies whose illness will never fully go away, and some that sadly haven’t won their particular battle. We are the lucky ones and (hopefully) all of our troubles are behind us now and we can carry on being a normal, happy little family.


What does your family think about you writing this book?

They are all very proud of me and almost on a daily basis my dad asks “have you sold any more books” and “got any more reviews”. My awesome wife can’t actually bring herself to read the book though. For me, I will happily sit and talk to complete strangers all day long about what we have been through and to be fair Debs will do likewise but reading the book is a bridge to far for her. I totally respect her opinion on this. She has said it would be just too powerful and open up old wounds. It’s a fair point.


Finally, tell us if you will a little about Charlotte and Sam, are they like my kids, squabbling one minute and playing nicely the next? Do you feel more protective of Charlotte given what she’s been through and do you think that will ever go away?

I am actually incredibly lucky that both Charlotte and Sam are awesome kids. They are so loving and so affectionate. Not just to their mum and dad but to each other as well. Most of the time that is! But they are also normal kids. The older they get the more their differences are standing out. Charlotte is getting to an age now where ‘one direction’ and ‘JLS’ take up most of her time but for Sam its all about ‘Lego Star Wars’ and football. We now have to enter into negotiations with the pair of them over who gets to watch what first. But its all good fun and I guess is part of the joys of being a parent. And I wouldn’t change it for all the money in the world.
I wouldn’t say I am more protective over Charlotte other than the fact she is a girl so I am naturally going to be a little more protective over her than my son (if Charlotte falls off her bike I will run to her, give her a big cuddle and make sure she is ok but if Sam falls off his bike I will shout “get back on son, its only a bit of blood”). But like I say, I think that is just the difference between parenting girls and boys.
As for their health I am definitely more concerned over Charlotte’s health than Sam. When Charlotte gets a cold or a little bug it brings it all flooding back and I can’t help but fear it will end up in a hospital visit. Thankfully that is rarely the case.


With thanks to Pete for the opportunity to review his book and for the fabulous, warm and open interview. All the best to you and your family.